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24.12.2016
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24.12.2016
Dear friends, my name is Nasir, the Executive Governor of the Federal Capital Territory.
Hear my story, since the secret is already out. Of course I took the funds
earmarked for our healthcare and educational infrastructure.
Instead of buying bricks and cement, I gambled every
single naira away playing on online casino sites.
The worst part of this whole mess: my legal wife is threatening divorce.
She is extremely angry and unfair complaining
that my gambling addiction ruined her Dubai luxury shopping trips.
How wicked! She planned to buy half of Dubai Mall,
while I was busy chasing jackpots on the internet. My wife has no sympathy for my betting losses, she
only cares about her designer wardrobe. Meanwhile, my girlfriend is also stressing me out, who is equally
upset that I can no longer afford.
Let's be honest about the real disaster here: online gambling in Nigeria has gone
completely out of control. Across our streets and on every mobile phone,
young people and foolish leaders like me are getting addicted to these online betting platforms.
These online casinos are the true enemies of our progress.
They swallowed the funds meant for healthcare and education, leaving our children to
study under trees, while fools like me spin virtual wheels.
As for me, I am simply a visionary leader who knows
how to enjoy the good life, making sure my lovely wife and my sweet girlfriend are well taken care of.
It baffles me why anyone would call me corrupt
or question my financial choices. After all, I am just a man of refined tastes who enjoys a little
harmless digital entertainment on my phone.
The problem is definitely those crooked online betting sites.
If those online casinos weren't so rigged, my lucky spin would have hit, funding all our infrastructure while
keeping my family fully satisfied. Do not blame hardworking
politicians like myself, but rather hold those greedy online casinos accountable for ruining a perfectly brilliant
budget strategy. -
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